Blogging

I took a decision, a little to surprise you all and a lot more to surprise myself. It feels somewhat weird to tell but I am writing this as my last blog post.

As I am telling this, I can’t help recalling my first one and followed up many. That even reminds me of my friend comparing his numbers with mine. And every time he said that, Sorry but I laughed at your cute reaction. Honestly numbers don’t count. They never did. And I am big fan of your writing, you sure know that.

Well, I am certainly not here for a big farewell boring bid-bye post. But yes I would like to thanks for making me smile and encouraging me every time by giving those reviews and suggestions. I am even glad to have found some really sweet readers on my blog, one of them turned out to be pretty nice friend too. This guy is himself a blogger. (You can check his great blog -> https://mymindsjournal.com/ )

And not to forget; each one of you who has been reading my posts, taking out your little time, it truly meant a lot.

I began this journey with no hope really and probably I am leaving the journey mid way with really no hope of coming back. But I’d like to clear that my decision is not out of depression struck situation. Life has been pretty awesome to me always. Yes I have problems like everyone else. But my bonding with my problems are little weird and kind a silly. I guess mine loves me so much that it never leaves me but also makes sure to never hate me. It simply is my all time go-along-forever kind companion. We both can’t live without each other.

I personally believe blogging is about expressing yourself by your words. You convey your thoughts, your ideas, your imagination and anything or maybe everything through words.  It’s like your words is forming your own identity. They describe you in their own way. Writing helps you connect with others and more of it with your own self. And blogging is one of the best experiences I ever had. It gave me a platform where I can speak and be heard and grow.

I am leaving because for me it’s no more about words. Sadly I realise my words don’t connect anymore. Or rather I should say the more I try to express, the more of it creates distance. Before it further creates a different identity of mine, I want to accept that silence is what I need.

“Yours words should be your best friend but not a forced burdened relationship.”

I and my words don’t share the same bonding now. It has become like a complicated marriage and probably would take a long time to recreate those old beautiful ‘us’ feeling. Might be I am playing the selfish one by taking this decision of being apart. Hopelessly, I had no other choice.

So not much more left to say I just want to end this by saying few words unsaid…

(Small pause for those who shall miss me :P)

Whatever and however I have been, I am glad I was there. I am glad you welcomed me and it happened. Probably you’ll not remember me as a blogger. But I will never forget my readers and their love. My existence was from you all. Today if I am leaving, it’s because something shouldn’t stay once it has lost its real meaning.

But yeah, you all amazing bloggers out there- Keep blogging and rocking. I am still there as your active reader. Even I am waiting for two of my sweethearts to start their blogs soon. I can’t wait to read yours too. And my dear cute friend you get a chance to increase your numbers now. LOL!

🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

 

Let Life Surprise You

Say it my habit or anything, on year-end I can’t help penning down my feelings. Yeah sometimes expressing those feelings in words is a tough task, especially now, when I am not having anymore the habit to express much.  I am not sure enough if my words would express them to the best or not.

2016 has been a year for me, which was unbelievably surprising….

A person gets surprised when he or she isn’t expecting something to happen. In my case, I knew everything that was supposed to happen. Life did give me chance to plan every situation. But still when your own plans surprises you in a much unexpected manner, you tend to realize how strange life can be.

I presumed I was prepared. My assumptions were so wrong.

My own planned life changed me and I wasn’t me anymore. And when I lost myself, I turned up to become a new me. There was no time to care if the world would like the new girl in me. I just changed. And I knew my life affected me in its strange way. Still I tend to admire that strangely.

The year surely made me realize both the extremely worst and amazingly beautiful side of relationships. They might complicate me, but still they complete me.

“I admit I am weak for you, but you are my strength” I said to myself as we walked on a path that was different for both of us. We both walked together but separately.

I sighed. I can’t stop our life from playing its role. I won’t stop you ever to live your life. But I’ll love you for those moments when you played your best role in my life. And I will love you a lot for those moments, hoping my love lasts forever in your life.

I saw you stood there, waiting for me. I knew I could say so much, I could hug you tight to not let you go. But I noticed my reflection in your eyes. I couldn’t move or utter anything. I kept looking at you.

My love, my lips when smiled with you, it was the best ever. Even as we bid byes, your eyes said they adored my smile.

Life, yes you made me realize, it too can surprise me. Bad or good, surprises are always affecting.

“I hate you. I regret meeting you.” Your temporarily last words hit me hard.

If I happen to shed tears for you, they were the most.

I never wanted us to end, I never wanted this journey of planned surprises to end, and I never wanted this year to come to an end. But I can’t, and I won’t stop anyone or anything. I would await new surprises, because I am falling in love with your way to surprise me. Life!

 

Reflection

As the curtains of the room were drawn, the morning sun rays filled her room with light. She woke up quickly to freshen up. The girl had worn her not much selective dress. She sat in front of her dressing table. And her hands moved in her hair locks while she saw herself in the mirror.

She didn’t look pretty beautiful. It was a simple reflection of an ordinary girl.

She gazed at her tired looking eyes, which seem to have cried throughout the night at her lost life. The pair of brown fantasizing eyes was sad as they had witnessed their every dream breaking down.

She then stared down at her smiling lips, making her surprised in her complete attire.

Her mind questioned her fictional joy curve in the harsh realities of life. She heard her heart answering his name as the only reason.

The mentioning of his name and she could sense her breathing go slow.

He was that part of her life, which was not life but love. The tiny piece she could define as happiness in her life that helped her swallow the remaining bigger portion of her dull living.

She stood up to pick her bag kept on the bed. Her instant careless move led to a sharp twist and ache in her ankle. Out of pain, her hand mechanically tightened her hold on the bedside and her eyes shut. The closed eyes, recalled how his arms had held her tightly saving her from falling down the other day.

She felt mesmerized thinking how he had been admiringly caring for her. Every time her life made her loose her balance; His presence, his touch, his hold, his every memory was her strength.

She slowly turned around seeking support of wall, staring one last time at herself in the mirror. Her face in the reflection told her how she was unsure about life yet sure enough to believe on his love.

His love didn’t utter these words but she knew it wanted to express; her life can make her lose but won’t be able to win over her until she has his love with her.

As she walked out and felt the heat on her skin, her eyes looked up. The pair of eyes reflexively closed sharply, not being able to open and gaze at sun. The sweat forming up on her skin told her the day was going to be warm and harsh. But next instant, her stressful eyes calmed down as her lips again smiled beautifully remembering how he had promised this day he will not let her be alone.

 ‘I will come to not to be with you, but to have you with me.’ He had said when she denied him to meet her today.

She knew life would change seasons and might harm her but his love will protect her in every season.

She decided to not stop but step out in the traffic and noise. She was amazed how love can create power within her.

Her books read you’d been shadow kissed if you are supposed dead and brought back to life by someone. It awakens your soul more powerfully. Her thoughts were intervened as she saw him waving at the other side of road. He glanced exchanging a smile at her. She too smiled a little more.

She kept watching him all the while crossing the path to reach her, and as she saw him standing closer to her, she could not stop herself from gazing.

He knew she wasn’t gazing at him, but at her reflection in his eyes. He smirked. She blushed silly; feeling like shadow kissed by love of her gorgeous man- Him!