Past few days had been painful, as sickness took over my body. I felt weak and I hated this feeling.
I missed my loved ones. I wanted them to hear them, to be with them. Wouldn’t they too be missing me? I wondered. I won’t want to worry them. Still I wanted to let them know- a lot!
My mind felt lost in the pool of thoughts. I wanted to overcome it- the fear, the weakness. I wanted to relax my out raising heart beats. Three glasses of water down my throat and I presumed it would wash off my brain. But sadly nothing such kind of thing happened. I still felt low.
I walked to my room, and sunk in my blanket hoping to doze off. Rather swiftly the low feeling turned into painful, as the pain hit my abdomen and pelvic area. I realised I shouldn’t force my body and go slow. I curled up my knees and tried to relax my muscles.
Pain and love goes together, it’s said. And at this moment I recalled my love and our forever moments. I still seemed blank as my nervous system wasn’t able to understand my emotions.
Something out of sudden hit my mind; I knew it followed up with the urge to hold the pen in my fingers. They wanted to write my thoughts.
Thinking of every possible thing that could lighten up my disheartened condition, I recalled of my past days. It was strange how time changed me into stone, which is meant to be silent. I wanted to speak, I wanted to scream. I wanted to express. And most of all I wanted to write. I had loved writing. And don’t know but that reminded me of you. Maybe cause I saw the same love for writing in you.
Yes, you acted as a dose to my emotions, allowing them to be expressed. Reading your words, your heart; it felt connected. How and why? I simply don’t know.
You were lost then, I realised. You aren’t there anymore, I sadly admitted.
“You are so sweet. And we would meet” I remembered your sugary replies. They left me diabetic. Yeah, I missed our short but cheerful conversations. I miss smiling like a kid whenever I saw your comment, as if I got my desired toy. I surely miss that toy in you.
I realised I wanted to have you there once again. I know it’s selfish of me to demand you, just for me. But I wish I could talk to you again. I hope I could tell I am concerned about you and confirm your well being.
Some people meant nothing to you yet they give so much to you. You were the encouraging element to my excitement to express. No wonder you played a role to always boost up that willingness to express more and more. I miss expressing myself.
Just once, I want to make you read this, my dedication to you. For you are unknown yet my own Gabriela. Cheers to our writing!
P.S. http://cribbings.wordpress.com/ check hers!